Sunday, April 17, 2011


It doesn't matter the question, "Do you want an apple?" "Are you hungry?" "Are you tired?" "Can Mommy have a kiss?" "Do you want to walk?" "Do you want me to carry you?" your 1-year-old will likely answer "No."

Until a child is approximately 13 months old, they do not really know the difference between yes and no. Once they learn the difference, their go to response may still be "no". At this age they are learning that they have some choices and can make their own decisions, so even if they do want something, they may still reject it just because they can. This is a phase that most kids go through and for the most part parents have to ride out; however, there are some things you can do to help.

Cut down on your nos - If your child asks for something they can't have/do, instead of telling them no tell them later. If they are misbehaving, tell them stop or better yet tell them what you want them to do instead (i.e. "please use your walking feet" instead of "no, stop running"). Save no for when they are doing something that is unsafe.

Watch what he does, not what he says - If your child reaches for something or does what you ask after saying "no," he really meant "yes" -- no need to scold him! If he ignores you after he says "no," though, he probably meant it.

Don't ask - Tell him what you'd like him to do instead of giving him a chance to respond negatively (i.e. "It's time to put your pajamas on" instead of "Do you want to put your pajamas on?") Rather than asking whether he wants juice, sit his cup where he can reach it if he chooses.

These are just a few helpful hints to get your through the saying "no" for the sake of saying "no" phase. Remember patience is your friend.

1 comment:

Sarah Allen said...

This is great advice, and so true :) Thanks for sharing!

Sarah Allen
(my creative writing blog)